4. August 2020  |  by Jutta Talley
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How to speak so others really listen – in a video call, meeting or presentation?

“Last week in a meeting I shared my idea and nobody listened. Two minutes later a colleague mentioned the same and everybody picked up on it.”

I have heard this type of story many times and maybe your have experienced the same. If you have something to say, you wich to be listened to. Now what can you do and how can you speak so others really listen?

There are some common mistakes that you can avoid and some ideas you can work with. In this article you will find tips on how to talk with a deep voice first, secondly learn how to talk clear and attractive and finally get some ideas on how to present charismatic.

How can I speak with a deep voice?

For example when people get nervous or emotional, the tone of voice often changes. It makes a difference in which way your voice changes when you’re nervous. Does it sound tense and high? In that case most likely people don’t like to listen to you as much as when it sounds relaxed and deep. But the good news is – you can do something about it.

Tipps – how to speak with a deep voice even when your nervous

  • The way you hold your head makes a difference. When you sit, read out loud, look at the ones you talk to, make sure you keep your neck relaxed and your head in a neutral position.
  • Standing – with relaxed feet. When nervous muscle tension in your legs and feet is often much higher then when relaxed. Not only is this uncomfortable, it can influence the tone of your voice. Relaxe your muscles in legs and also feet – while sitting and standing and your voice will relaxe too.
  • Relax your voice actively. Think of something yummy and say – "mmm". Make sure you feel the vibration of your own voice at your sternum by checking it with your hand. Now while speaking keep this vibration in your voice.
How to speak
How to speak attractively

How to talk clearly and attractively?

Do I need to speak up and raise my voice? How can I train my pronunciation? In general while talking your tongue, lips and also jaw play an important role. The more trained they are the better you can speak and be heard. For being well heard by others you don’t necessary have to speak louder – but clearer!

Exercises – how to train your pronunciation

  • Move your lips forming a kiss and smile
  • Move your tongue in every corner of your mouth
  • Relax your jaw by yawning, as well let you tongue „fall“ forward while making sounds “tha -tha -tha -tha”
  • Speak without lips. Next hide your teeth with your lips speaking extremely clear: numbers, weekdays, read poem: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, All the King’s horses and all the King’s men, Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

Extra tip for how to speak with expressive pronunciation:

You can focus on use soft sounds in your language (m, n, l) to sound calm and warm. Or you can pronounce hard sounds extra clear (p, t, k and f, s, sh) to sound energetic and motivating.

How to speak
Presenting well and charismatic as an expert.

How can I present charismatic?

Maybe you have noticed this, when speaking factual people sometimes lose some of their charisma in the way of speaking. In fact they speak monoton and less charismatic which consequently can be tiring to listen to.

In order to listen to you, people need to get an idea of your passion, about your motivation and also your emotion. How to speak more emotionally and passionately? To be aware of your own motivations, feelings and passions can be helpful in expressing them. In order to to be more aware of them take a few moments and for following exercise. Finally mentalize your answers while speaking to your listeners.

Exercise – finding my motives

Think of the deeper reason, why you speak! What do you want to bring across? And what is your message? Take a moment for following questions:

      1. Why am I speaking?
      2. And why is this important?
      3. Which further reasons make it important?
      4. And why is this important to me personally? Now I have found my own deep value: _________________

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Jutta Talley
Jutta Talley ist freiberufliche Trainerin und Coach, die Personen und Organisationen dabei hilft, besser zu kommunizieren. Neben Ihrer freiberuflichen Tätigkeit lehrt sie an der Hochschule Hannover das Sprechen am Mikrofon und ist Gründungsmitglied des Vereins StillLeben e.V., der sich seit Jahren erfolgreich für Menschen mit einer seltenen Kommunikationsproblematik einsetzt. Jutta Talley liebt die Natur und ist gern unterwegs per Rad, Kajak oder zu Fuß.